Dog Jokes

What does a dog get after it finishes school?

A dog-ree! (degree)
From Fred, age 13, London, England

What dog keeps the best time?

A watch dog.
From Barbara, a parent, San Diego, CA

What dog has the most ticks?

A watch dog!
From Saige, CA

What did the dog say to the cat?

Nothing! Dogs can't talk!
From Lauren, age 9, Ohio,U.S.A

Their was a female dog who went to three male dogs and asked them to make a sentence that had liver and cheese in the sentence. So the first dog said "Would you like some liver and cheese?"

She didn't like that sentence, so she turned to the next dog. Annd the next dog said, "Do you have any liver or cheese?"

She didn't say a thing and then turned to the next dog, and asked him to say a sentence with liver and cheese in it.

And the last dog said, "Liver alone. Cheese mine".
From Mae-May, age 14, U.S.A.

Where do you find a one-legged dog?

Where you left it!
From J Dawg, age 14, Bensalem, PA

What do you sing while bathing your dog?

Working at the dog wash!
From Lily, age 10, Louisville, Kentucky

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left him!
From Vanesa, age 6, USA

How do you know when it's raining cats and dogs?

When you step in a poodle.
From Anna, age 17, Canada

Old mother Hubbard went to the cuboard to get her poor dog a bone, but when she opened it, what letters did she find?

"M" and "T"!
From Vathsalya, age 7, Dallas,TX

What do you get when you cross a Poodle,a Cocker Spaniel and a rooster?

A Cocka-Poodle-Doo!
From Virginia K., age 9, Sarasota, Florida

What are a dog's favorite pizza toppings?

Pupperona and muttarella! (pepperoni and mozzarella)
From Jade, age 9, Kentucky

What kind of dog likes to fight?

A boxer!
From Ally, age 11, St. Petersburg, FL

What do you get if you cross a dog with a phone?

A Golden Receiver!
From Lucas, age 11, Kitchener, Ontario

What do you call a dog lying in the sun?

A hot dog!
From Katy, age 11, Austin, TX

Why is it better to have a tree in your house than a dog?

Because its bark will not bother the neighbors!!
From a reader, age 9, Argentina

Why did the dog sit by the campfire?

He wanted to be a HOT DOG!
From Chris and Christina (twins), age 11, Fort Worth, TX

What's more amazing than a talking dog?

A spelling bee!!
From Katherine, age 9, British Columbia,Canada

What kind of dog likes baths?

A shampoodle.
From Neal, age 8, Mcpherson, Kansas

What do you call a great dog detective?

Sherlock Bones!
From Jemma, age 10, Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa

Why does a dog scratch himself?

Because no one else knows where it itches.
From Vidushi, age 12, New Delhi, India

What did the girl say when she lost her puppy?

Doggone!
From a reader, age 8, Canada

What do you call a dog called Bob?

Bob!
From Stephanie, age 11,Victoria, Australia

Where do you put your dog when you bring him downtown?

In a barking lot!!!
From Haley, age 9, Lewiston, Maine

What did the dog pick up at the counter?

A hot-dog!
From Daniela, age 8, California

Why do dogs stay in the shade?

Because if they stay in the sun they would become "hot dogs"!
From Mario, age 11, New York, USA

Why did the dog chase after the skeleton?

He wanted a large bone!
From Kelsey, age 10, Texas

Why can't a Dalmatian puppy hide from her mom?

Because he's already been spotted!
From Annie, age 11, Korea

Why did the dog chew his paw?

To get to the bone!
From Julia, age 9, Bethany, CT

How does a dog stop a VCR?

He presses the "paws" button!
From Tanya L., age 10, Tecumseh

For more kids jokes, visit Jokes By Kids

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